The Truth About Your Lying

Long ago, I was advised that people come into our lives for either a reason, a season, or a lifetime. I will readily admit that I didn't fully understand the cliché at the moment, but I have grown to adopt this mentality as way of saving myself from heartache, false expectations of others, and emotional pitfalls. Although it may seem unfair to categorize people at the onset of a relationship, it is easier to separate yourself from them if you truly understand which of these three areas they were truly meant to effectuate in your life.

Comrades: Some people come into your life for a reason. They are there to teach you an immediate lesson, to help you through a rough patch, and to either allow you to bless them or to be a blessing to you. The relationships established with these people can last for a fleeting moment or even a few years, but their purpose is clearly defined and they can be relied upon for the fulfillment of an immediate need. Knowing this, you can clearly define the boundaries of this relationship and, when it ends, you can move on unscathed.

Constituents: Another group of people can come into your life for a season. These people may linger for months or even a few years as well. Your relationships with them take on a more emotional impact and they teach you (or you teach them) long-term lessons that will impact you throughout your life. In this instance, there is often a teacher/student role established and many harsh lessons may be learned through the experiences you share.

This relationship is much like a see-saw because the roles of teacher and student are often determined by the circumstance, not the members involved.  One person’s strengths may be the other's weakness and one person’s experiences may bridge the gap for another's understanding in other occurrences in life.   Some lessons are hard learned and both people stand to gain greater knowledge of their own limitations after enduring emotional scars that may, eventually, drive them apart.   

Some of these yin-yang, heartfelt relationships are often deemed toxic by some as they come to an end, but the lessons gained by each person are proven invaluable over the course of time. Some end in betrayal or the exposure of traits that you do not wish to foster in your life.  Just remember that birds of a feather tend to flock together, so ending one relationship may require cutting toes with a few others as well. 

These relationships simply "fizzle" out as you take the lessons that you needed to learn and move on.  Some end dramatically while others simply fade with time.  As you continue to clean your house of these toxic relations, you may go through revelations and moments of shock, but just be relieved that you have freed yourself from energy that will, eventually, destroy itself.  

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Confidants: Another group of people come into your life for a lifetime.  These people are the well-defined, lifelong friendships that evolve after sifting through the reasons and seasons of others.  A true friend, companion, and/or lover knows your strengths and revels in them.  They also know your weaknesses and they have their own way of compensating for them as well.  They complete you.  You, in turn, complete them. 

Lifetime companions have your best interests at heart at all times and they temper those interests with your immediate needs and concerns as well as your long-term goals.  In essence, they may act as your external conscious as they prove themselves to be your ultimate friends.  They each determine their niche’ in your life and may appeal to a persona or characteristic of your psyche’; fueling your relationship with antagonistic energies that catapult you to move toward your end goals.

Knowing where a person “fits” into your personal make-up only strengthens your knowledge of self.  We all have good and bad influences in life but, we control their overall impact.  Know your limitations – but also know where you can draw strength.  And, even more importantly, know when and where to draw the line. 

Learn what you can from every encounter and become a better person – whether it is for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. 

But alas, this is just ONE Man’s Opinion… What is yours?